Monday, June 19, 2017

Be Confident in Following Your Instincts

Being able to see the good in people is a great skill, it helps you to cope with bad situations and it leaves you with hope. I was once told by someone that hope was all that they had left and honestly, sometimes that’s what keeps us from breaking. Having hope is a wonderful coping mechanism but not when you use it at risk of your own well-being. Often times our judgement is clouded when we feel strongly about someone, this could be a close friend, family member or partner. Reality is there comes a time when it is not selfish to put your own gut instincts ahead of everything else.

I’ve written time and time again about instincts and how they truly can drive us in the right direction. As human beings, we can’t think instincts are guiding us during that time of the month or high emotional moments. Rather our instincts guide us in everyday, normal life living. Let’s say you are having a good day but something happens that stirs that internal radar. You know the radar, as it’s happened before, but you don’t want to listen to it, instead you analyze it. You then ask yourself, “am I just being hormonal?” or “am I being unreasonable?” or perhaps, “am I fueling this fake instinctual reaction?” While the answers could be yes, only you will know for sure. 

There are certainly moments of high stress in life where we may confuse anxiety for instincts and it’s even harder to determine when someone is telling you that you need to get control of your anxiety and emotions. The one thing about following your instincts is that no one else will comprehend just what that radar is telling you. This is your own personal internal protection device, meant to guide you in a positive direction. Instincts won’t keep you from feeling pain or hurting others, that’s a natural part of life. We must experience bad times and make mistakes in order to grow and learn as a human being.

If you are feeling like something just isn’t right and you’ve tried to communicate this with a loved one, be it the friend, family member or partner, yet you don’t seem to get anywhere and feel like nothing is getting resolved and that pit in your stomach is getting worse, then you need to work towards figuring it out on your own. These instincts will guide you in the right direction; sure it will be difficult at first because often times our instincts are protecting us from a harmful future so that means a big change. Change isn’t easy for anyone, but sometimes it’s a necessary part of life. 

When you let go of the fear that has been instilled within you, that you are not good enough or that you’re crazy for following your instincts and then live a life based on your own internal happiness and completeness, you will find in time that you feel more confident and secure in life. No other person can tell you what is right or wrong, and sometimes you may confuse anxiety or hormones for instincts, but that’s the joy of learning yourself. We all have to take the leap to trust in our instincts and then learn from that moment so that you are never in the same situation again. 

If you are having trouble distinguishing instincts from high emotion, perhaps it’s time to consider meeting with a professional who can guide you forward in an unbiased way. A professional will not tell you what to do but they can help you to interpret what’s going on, how you feel about it and help you come to a conclusion that allows you to feel confident.