Saturday, September 11, 2010

Dealing with an Angry Child

My middle son is often so angered that he is extremely violent to his whole family. I don't know how many times I have been washing dishes or sitting on the couch just to be slammed by his closed fists. We have spent two years trying to get help for him but at age 2 they were obviously reluctant to diagnose him with much more than "ADHD tendencies". The neurologist came to that conclusion based on seeing that our other two children were relatively "normal". I am not saying my middle son isn't normal, but you can quite obviously see there is a different volatile personality than any of my other children or even that of myself or Justin.

It seems bi-polar runs in my family pretty heavily and having my four year old adopted we don't know much of his health history on the biological father's side. I was only in that family for a little over a year therefore based on my observations of what I heard or saw I can only say it does seem that family may have some anger issues and possible mental health issues. The poor little dude has it from both sides. AJ is his name and he has skin issues, had ear issues and seems to be the only one of my three who lives in the pediatricians office.

AJ has trouble sleeping too, but his emotional well being doesn't seem to change based on sleep. Back when he was two and three we saw that lack of sleep made him more aggressive but between 3 and 4 we thought he was actually getting better. This is so stressful not only for him but for us as a family. We are a very loving, affectionate family and to have one child who is just so angry makes it hard to be loving and affectionate.  When AJ is angry sometimes, very rarely, you can actually talk softly to him and kind to "wack him out of it" so to speak. There seems to be no solution and the pediatricians are not helping us. Pediatricians want to wait til he is in school so the school can code him and that I feel is just stupid. We are the parents and everyone in this house can speak for the loving family we are but no matter how loving we are it doesn't change the fact that AJ is a very angry little dude.

I am one frustrated and sad Mama when I see my four year old son be so upset and angry. I love him dearly and hope someday someone will listen to it before I get a black one of these days.
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