Saturday, February 6, 2010

Relationship Disasters

Are you looking at facing the possibility of ending a current relationship? Maybe you recently got out of a relationship. Whatever your situation is if you find yourself not wanting to be with the person you are currently with, take a moment to look in the mirror at yourself. YES I said it, LOOK AT YOURSELF!

Seriously, sometimes the problems you are seeing in a relationship is simply a matter of how you perceive things or how you programmed yourself to respond to situations. Starting from an early age we look to our parents as our first role models in love, relationships and dating. Were your parents truly happily married for years? Did they have a love that was unconditional and a support like no other you have ever seen OR were they like so many other parents in this world and divorced, remarried and quite possibly divorced and remarried again and again?

You see, as much as we hate to admit it, we do learn how to live our lives based on our surroundings and up until the age you move out of your parents home, those are the people who have instilled learned behavior into your head. Before you take the lunge to leave a relationship I invite you to take a peek at what you really want and need in life and a relationship. If it comes down to leaving your current relationship then so be it, but be certain that you take the time to have closure from that relationship and truly understand what went wrong so that you are not re-living the mistakes made in that relationship with your new relationship.

Many times we have habitual behaviors that will not go away unless we take the time to truly listen to our hearts. Be certain to know what you need and want in a relationship and settle for nothing less than what would work for you. Many people will overlook something in a "prospect" because they want so badly to be loved and in a committed relationship, society doesn't help with this because as woman we are not suppose to play the field so to speak. Women are seen in a negative light if they take the time to go out and date multiple men (no I am not referring to sleeping around - having sexual intercourse). Women and men have every right to date multiple people as long as they are being honest to each of these people and are not having sex with all of them, unless that's your thing and everyone is okay with it, then hey it's your life, just protect yourself if you know what I mean.

When ending one relationship you may find yourself depressed, crying often, losing weight or eating more and you may even want to just sit around and pout about it, even if the decision was yours, breaking up is a hard thing to go through. There may be times when you sit around wondering what is wrong with you, why can't you just keep a good relationship? You may even be thinking geez everyone thinks this is a great guy, why can't I see that he is a great guy?! The problem is not the character of the other person, the problem is that even the best of the best people in the world may not be the correct match for you, and that is okay. No one but you should determine what is right for your life and how you live it. Do not allow family, friends or anyone else in this world ever tell you that you are making a huge mistake, okay I take that back, let them tell you that, but take it at face value. If someone is judging you based on your relationship situation when the reality is they do not reside in the same household with you, then they have an outsiders view, and we all know a realtionship can be very different in private than when seen in the public eye.

No matter what your situation is, remember to live your life for YOU and if you have children, live your life for THEIR HAPPINESS too! Life is too short to sit and dwell on situations you know in your heart aren't right for YOU and YOUR HAPPINESS.

Make it a Happy Day!

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