Friday, January 15, 2010

You Can't Break Me

I am sorry that you can't tear me down, break me any longer. I am strong, and I am positive. I know that I am not perfect, I never strive to be perfect. If I were a perfect person my life would be colorless. I enjoy the ups and downs, I enjoy waking up each day to a brighter mind and stronger heart because of the challenges I faced the day before.

If you don't agree with what I say or do then that is okay. It is your right to disagree with whatever actions I may have completed yesterday but today is a whole new day and this day is a positive one. Do you really need to break me down to make yourself happier? I used to feel anger and bitterness towards you for breaking me down, for always being so pessimistic but then I woke up, I opened my eyes and realized that you are only a sad person yourself. I refuse to judge the decisions you make, it's your life, you are an adult, why oh why can't you just let well enough be and stop judging me?



Blood is thicker than water, but sometimes I swear people just don't get that. When friendships are stronger than blood it makes me sad, simply because I would like to know that my children will never have to live this battle that I face daily. I only wish for my children to be happy and healthy in life, if they make decisions I disagree with then so be it! I want my children to know that they have freedom to be their own unique person, even if I do not understand nor approve of who that person is. It's very hard to raise children, it's hard to face the challenges of life without a support system. What I say to those who can not support me regardless of their personal opinions is to stick to themselves. If you are going to try to tear me down in a time of my life when I need a shoulder to cry on then I say good bye to you, come and find me when you are able to see your own faults and not judge me for mine.

As an adult we all make decisions, and as a parent we need to know when to step back and allow our children to live their lives. I have struggles now with my children doing things I do not approve of, or things that make me tilt my head and wonder why in the world they did what they did, but I never once put them down for their actions. I refuse to destroy my children's positive attitude.

Life is a battle, and if you are unhappy with yourself and your life do not bring me into it. I have learned to keep my head up and keeping my head up is what gets me through each day. I used to live under your thumb, thinking that being judgmental and negative was okay and I am very happy to say that I enjoy living an open minded life, I enjoy finding the good in people and I enjoy being outgoing and social. If you can't handle my new found attitdue and personality then please leave me be. I am raising positive children because of my new found attitude and personality. Simple as simple can be, the little girl you used to know that was lost and yearning for a way to be loved is no longer there, that little girl has grown up to be a more confident, positive adult and can't you just see that and be proud of the person I have become?

Make it a Happy Day!


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